Recently, during our normal story time before bed, my daughter asked me to tell her a story about our family. I have done this a couple of times in the past and told stories about my sisters or cousins, but this time I decided to teach her about her ancestors. Growing up my mom was a bit of a family historian. She, along with a couple of other family members, ensured that the written records of our family (all 4 lines that contributed to her kids) were documented and stories preserved. In retirement she wrote those down in family history books that we can use to help keep the story of our family alive for my kids and future generations.
Teaching Kids About Their Families Helps Them Better Understand Themselves
What I enjoyed most when hearing stories about our family, both the good and the not so good, is that it helped me understand more of who I am and where I came from. As I became a mom, I wanted to be sure to continue this tradition. Whether it be family medical history (physical and mental) or the story of how we came to live in America, these stores are important pieces of understanding my lineage so I can better understand patterns and behaviors that I want to keep and those that I want to leave behind. Most importantly, it has helped me understand more of who I am so I can make better decisions of who I want to be.
Ancestral Bedtime Story About Perseverance
When my 6.5-year-old asked to learn about her ancestors, I told her the story of her great-great grandma Erna, someone who I have admired even though I never knew her. She had tremendous strength to survive war and courage to immigrate to the US at a young age (19) with her half-sister (13) to build a new life. She survived WW1 in Germany after her home was bombed out, her family was homeless and starving, her father was injured and became an invalid who could only move in a wheelbarrow, and watched her younger sister starve to death. She survived by stealing milk or eggs from farms in the cover of night and by eating grass. Eventually she was sponsored to go to the US, as their family could only get 2 passages at the time and came over on an indentured servant contract not speaking a word of English. She eventually met another immigrant and had a family. Erna was not only a survivor but a model of perseverance. She had a strong will and never gave up. A true warrior who fought to live and built a life that while not free of pain, was still good.
Beyond Individuals, Storytelling Benefits Humanity
Storytelling is so important for humanity. It is important to tell the stories of past cultures, societies, families, and individuals as there are so many lessons we can learn about ourselves through understanding and empathizing with those who came before us. After telling these stories of our ancestors, we reflected on their stories with gratitude, and I explained how we honor them by living the best lives that we can – ultimately, we are here because of them! As we know, history often repeats itself. This is the same for both world history and family history. The more we know the truth of our history (not just what is in the books), but the truth of our families’ experiences, the more we can choose differently to hopefully not repeat the mistakes of the past.
Making Things Better for the Next Generation
The main lesson or message my parents constantly talked about growing up was making decisions to better the next generation. As the next generation, listening to these stories and honoring their experiences and sacrifices to learn lessons is extremely powerful. We do this so we can choose to write our own story and make choices to better ourselves and our world for the generations to come.
I believe that is what we are here to do as humans. To honor those who came before us by living our best lives by learning from and healing from the pain of the past to build a better future. The lives that we live are a story that we are creating and telling as we live them! I want my kids to understand that they are powerful storytellers who can leave a positive mark in this world through their daily actions and deeds. What we do, how we live, and how we love others matters, as we as a human family are in this together.
Lessons from Ancestral Stories as Fuel for Good
We are not what happens to us. We are not the circumstances or trauma that we suffer. These events are only part of our story, but we have the ability to heal and use those experiences as fuel for good.Storytelling is one way we can help our kids understand themselves and our families so that we all can create better futures. The only way we can make positive changes in this world is by first starting with ourselves, living our best life, and helping others to do the same. To do this we must better understand the stories of the past so we can actively work to create better stories for our future.