Gratitude. My heart is full of gratitude. My experience coming back home this weekend to read my book for the 3rd and 4th graders of the school I attended, as well as reconnecting with old volleyball teammates, coaches, and parents during our Hall of Fame induction event has been a wonderful experience. This weekend is one of those powerful times in life where connections were made, personal growth and healing happened, and things came full circle – encompassed with gratitude.
Lessons Learned on the Court Applicable to Life
20 years ago, in 2002, my high school volleyball team won the state championship. Throughout my high school sports career, I had the opportunity to play with and be coached by some amazing people. These experiences shaped me more than I realized. I was not the star player on this championship team full of seniors. I was a junior who loved the game, worked hard, and was an off the bench substitute who dreamed of the chance to shine. I knew I played a role in the win, even if I didn’t spend every minute on the court. What that taught me is that you don’t need to be the star player or the one out front with the highest stats to matter. You can make a difference by working hard, always trying your best, and never giving up – these are the things that I took with me off the court into life as well. Even with this amazing lesson, I still didn’t always feel good enough. It was a small seed that I tried to ignore but was always there.
Overcoming Seeds of Doubt
Fast forward 19 years later, I wrote my first book and was holding myself back in showing it to anyone or publishing it. I felt those seeds of doubt or not being good enough inside of me. This feeling, something I had worked on healing for a very long time, was holding me back. My daughter was the one, as a kindergartener, who inspired me to write and publish my book (that came from a story I originally told her during bedtime). When I told her I wasn’t an author and wasn’t sure how to make a book, she told me “You always say I can do anything, so why can’t you?”, this is what ultimately inspired me. I didn’t want her growing up and not seeing me pursue my dreams for the fear of not being good enough, because what does that mean anyway?
Just because I am not a starter in a championship team, doesn’t mean I didn’t deserve a trophy. Just because I may not (yet) be on the New York Times Best Seller list, doesn’t mean my story isn’t meant to be heard. If I make one good pass during a match point in the championship game that helps the team win, I am a key player. If one person reads my story and gets something out of it, I am a successful author. THIS is the lesson that I have learned and is where my gratitude stems from.
Finding Gratitude in the Experiences that Shaped Me
Being back home, connecting with friends, parents, and coaches from 20 years ago, and seeing how all those experiences shaped me into the person I am today makes me grateful. Grateful for the community I grew up in, grateful for the experiences I had, and grateful for the support I continue to receive from them moving forward. There was magic in the group of girls I got to play with, and magic in the relationships we shared. I didn’t realize at 18 when I left how special of a place it really was as I was so focused on the things I didn’t love, and the opportunities I wanted to explore outside of North Dakota. I am happy I followed my heart and explored as I had some amazing experiences, but I am also so grateful for the gifts this place provided in shaping me into the person I am today.
Bringing the Lessons Full Circle
No matter who you are, where you came from, and what you do, it’s important to remember that you matter and are enough. You don’t need to be the star to be successful. All you need to do is commit to learning, carry those lessons forward, find gratitude in the challenges, discover your gifts, find a way to use those gifts to make a difference, and never give up. This trip brought these lessons full circle for me, facilitated personal growth and healing that was needed in this moment in life, and is leaving me feeling infinitely grateful.